Arora Nin

They always say you don't know how good you have had it until it's gone. That has been a recurring theme in my life. There is no way to hold onto everything so tightly, to appreciate everything all at once. And so often, we don't notice how huge and important it really is, what integral part it plays in our lives, until it is no longer there. Getting my then 10-year-old daughter ready to spend her weekends with her father was a feeling, and a thing, I never expected to do or have to feel....

I watched a TED talk recently about how to triage your life. Red for urgent. Green for leave it alone for now. Black for what you already know is futile but are still trying to rescue. I have been sitting with those thoughts for weeks. Not because it told me anything I did not already know. Because it named, very precisely, what I had been refusing to look at directly. We all have black codes. We all know what they are. And we all know that the moment we stop pouring energy into rescuing the...

Who do you want to be? Not who were you. Not who did everyone need you to be. Not who did you spend the last ten years becoming because that is what the situation required. Who do you want to be? I ask that question because it is the only one worth asking and because nobody asked it of me when I needed it most. I had to get to the end of everything I thought I was building before I understood that the question was even available to me. I did not get here willingly. I want to say that plainly...